Tall, short, skinny, muscular, beautiful, brainy, artistic: with so many to choose from, we are involuntarily bound to compare and decide what we like the most. When people ask what qualities we look for in our ideal companion, we have a rigid set of qualities that explains our type. Unfortunately, when we do find this so-called type, it doesn’t always work out as we thought it would. The long walks on the beach at sunset changes to early bed time. In due course of time, phone conversations get shorter, we run out of things to say to each other and eventually petty fights and silly arguments fill our lives.


Sure, the beginnings are always charismatic but gradually, we start noticing all the flaws which we initially failed to see and finally, we re-consider our feelings where words like “maybe” and “what if” replace “forever” and “together”. While some of us are lucky enough to have found the “type” and spent healthy long years together or are married, the rest of us follow much more complicated turn of events where we wander around in search for something that we may never find.


What people don’t understand is that when they present a “type” for their ideal mate, they are actually binding themselves to a certain type of personality. With time, personalities always change. It is because of this that many relationships reach their demise -- because they tend to fall for what their counterpart is portraying instead of just loving them. In the virtual world, dating sites – which have accomplished so much commercially -- have failed in letting people know that love, unlike other emotions, doesn’t need a reason. It doesn’t need someone with size zero and it doesn’t need someone with eight packs. However attractive one might show themselves in a picture or flaunt all the things they’ve done in life, will not guarantee them love. And neither does exposing their flaws result in hate. Love, in its purest form, allows us to fall for someone despite their flaws. And that is the beauty of it. It is one of the main reasons why love is so hard or even impossible to explain.


There is always someone who loves us unconditionally. It could be a husband, a boyfriend or even a secret friend. What’s important, is to understand that love, cherish it and realize that love doesn’t need a reason. It doesn’t need any answers and it definitely doesn’t look for qualities or strengths. Love happens, whether one likes it or not; be it with the geeky guy or who has the highest grades in the class and eats alone or the prom king/queen of the century, who treats you like you were worthless; because love doesn’t care why or when. It just happens.


Everybody needs love and to be loved. Having a type creates a boundary that stops us from exploring and experiencing what could possibly lead to a beautiful life. It binds us in a state of prejudice, where we fail to see that sometimes the best things in life are always where we least expect. If we want to be loved, we must be open-minded to love itself. We can’t restrict ourselves from it and hope to find the perfect one at the same time. Letting someone know that we love them is one of the greatest life that can be shared and it is always a wonderful feeling to know that there is someone who loves us unconditionally. It doesn’t matter whom you love and it definitely doesn’t matter why. The only thing that does matter is that there is always someone who loves us just the way we love someone else. After all, love needs no answer. Love, as Paulho Coelho quotes, “simply is…”